The Accidental Columnist: Keeping the topic of adult circumcision under wraps helps no one

I’ve noticed a few trends when it comes to attitudes towards circumcision in Ireland. The first is that circumcision is a tradition of the ‘other’ – something that only Jewish and/or North American communities do. The second is the idea that circumcision is an invariably barbaric practice akin to genital mutilation and has no place in modern society, no less a sex-positive one.

I take issue with both of these ideas. The first dismisses the reality that there are many in Ireland who partake in religious practices that include circumcision, and in turn perpetuates the myth that one cannot be Irish without subscribing to Catholic tradition. Furthermore, circumcision is not exclusive to North American trends. And my biggest issue is that both of these notions ignore the many ways that someone can benefit from circumcision. Many have had their sexual experiences enhanced by circumcision, and I am one of them.

There are a whole host of circumstances where removing the foreskin can be of benefit. For example, you may, like me, suffer from phimosis. Phimosis is a condition wherein the foreskin is unable to fully retract over the glans, or head, of the penis. There’s also paraphimosis, where the foreskin gets stuck partially retracted over the glans of the penis, cutting off blood supply. Those with phimosis can also struggle with balanitis, when the head of the penis becomes sore and swollen. All of these conditions can make things like urinating, cleaning and having sex more difficult, and you may experience frequent tearing and infection.

I personally don’t agree with indiscriminate circumcision at birth. I believe in bodily autonomy and that extends to the idea that anyone with a penis should have a say in what is or isn’t removed from their body. But I also believe that demonising circumcision on the whole creates stigma and shame for folks who would benefit from this as a medical intervention.

It wasn’t until I was in my late teens that I realised I had phimosis. When I first presented to a doctor for assistance, they were very reluctant to recommend a circumcision, which led to just under a decade of me ‘hoping’ my phimosis would resolve itself. I was also afraid to go under the knife because of all of the things that people said about it – that I’d lose all sensation, I’d never enjoy sex again, and the pain from the surgery would be so unbearable that I’d regret ever going through with it.

But, when I was eventually able to have my circumcision, none of these things proved true. The pain of the surgery was uncomfortable, but manageable. The impact on sensation was minimal – and, in fact, the discomfort of phimosis was keeping me from enjoying full sensation to begin with. And when it came to enjoying sex, well, I had more options on the table now that previously just weren’t possible. I was also free from the internal monologue of “can they tell I have phimosis?” which plagued my earliest sexual experiences.

There are many other challenges when it comes to adult circumcision in Ireland. There are long waiting lists if you go for public treatment, and if you go privately you’re paying up to €2,000 for the surgery (a cost I’m sure will only rise as years go on). But as well as addressing the cost and infrastructure around circumcision in Ireland, we need to break down the stigma.

I’m not saying circumcision is right for everyone, but I will always argue that we shouldn’t treat it as a worst-case scenario or ominous bogeyman. In many ways, circumcision reinvigorated my life. There may be others out there who could benefit from the same, but won’t seek help because of the way we currently talk about circumcision.

You can hear more about my experience getting circumcised in my conversation with Dr Caroline West on the Glow West podcast. And if you feel your sexual health and enjoyment may benefit from an adult circumcision, talk to your GP.

Do you have trouble talking about your sexual health? Check out our masterclass with sex educator Grace Alice Ó Sé to help you shake off the stigma and find the words to say what you need.